I’ve now spent over a month working as a high school teacher and I’ve been thinking about all of the people who told me, “Most teachers feel like quitting the first year, sometimes into their second or third years.” Many people have also told me that they didn’t feel they had a handle on teaching until years after they started.
This scares me a little. For one, I’m coming to the teaching profession late—some people might say very late. I’m 53 years old, for crying out loud. I don’t HAVE all those years to “get comfortable” with teaching.
The good news is that I’m already starting to enjoy it. Makes me wonder if I’m in “La La Land” and not doing it right—or if some traumatic event related to teaching is just around the corner. (This attitude of anticipating the worst may explain why my husband and daughter inform me that I’m a cynic. What can I say? I like to plan ahead—so sue me.)
Each day in the classroom is getting better (with a few exceptions here and there). I’m sure it’s because I’m gaining more confidence, but the biggest reason is because I’m making connections—establishing relationships—with the kids. And I find that very rewarding.
I’m not deluded enough to think that I have made some lasting contribution to a student’s life, but, then again, who knows? I’ve been given opportunities to offer words of encouragement here and there and that, also, is a good feeling. One of the reasons I wanted to teach is because, after raising my daughter and going through cancer treatment, I had a new perspective on life. I realized that I had something worth sharing that I could pass on to another generation. I had more faith in myself and where God was leading me. Teaching (on the good days) fills me with purpose . . . . do I sound like a teaching novice?
Up to very recently, my students—with the exception of a few very gregarious ones—have had a wall up (some still do). It’s obvious that they’re feeling me out while getting to know me (who is this person?). Here’s what helps, though: I feel comfortable around THEM (most of the time). Looking back to my first day, I had my guard up, so I’ve been letting my wall down with them as well.
I’m literally one day ahead of the students with my lesson planning—nothing like living on the edge! I can see how a teacher who has been teaching for many years would have the drill down, possibly to the point of boredom. Ideally, a teacher should be continually learning and bringing up-to-date, fresh material to his/her students.
That aspect—bringing new material to the classroom—is my challenge. For example, I teach a Sales & Marketing class with only 12 students. I have a curriculum that is mostly established (from my predecessor), but I’ve tried to inject it with more relevant information, such as the topic of Social Media since it has impacted marketing more than anything else in recent memory.
For the first month, whenever I would ask a rhetorical question of my students, I got very little response. (I’m going to have to learn how to prod them for answers in a more skillful way, that’s for sure.) Half the boys in the class are failing. But I can see a spark of interest there every once in awhile. The kids are beginning to open up and give me their opinions. I’ve tried to bring in YouTube videos and other short video clips about our subject to keep them interested. It’s hard for a teacher to compete with every mobile device known to man in the hands of her students. So you do what you can.
Last Friday, I really threw caution to the wind. We were about to start (what I would call) a pretty dry, fairly boring unit on “Distribution” in the Sales & Marketing class. Since it was Friday, I knew the students would be less focused anyway, so I decided to postpone the Distrubution unit and do a one-day activity that might be more interesting and useful. I had bookmarked a site about entrepreneurship for future use, so I downloaded some lesson information from that site and prepared it (two hours in advance) for Friday’s class.
I started the class with a couple of short videos about entrepreneurs and then I handed out a questionnaire for students to assess where they fell in the “entrepreneurship traits” spectrum. Not surprisingly, the boys who are failing are the ones who scored highest as entrepreneurs. I explained to them that there were no right or wrong answers—it was solely an exercise for their own information. Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur, that’s for sure.
Part of the lesson also involved reading three stories about successful entrepreneurs and then a reflective paper (essay) about their goals (either entrepreneurial or otherwise). You would have thought I’d said a dirty word when I uttered, “essay.” Somehow, many of these students have arrived in high school with very little reading or writing skills. To be fair, a couple have learning disabilities and need more auditory instruction. Still, it’s disheartening to see how only a minority of the class can handle the idea of typing up a one-page “essay.”
It was interesting, though, to see what some of the students wrote. Some totally blew smoke and I knew it. But, there were a few others who I believe were very genuine in their attempts to write about their life goals.
I told them that there is almost something magical about writing down your goals. I shared with one student how I’d written a list of goals back in 2002 and forgotten about the list. About a month ago, I discovered the list and was awestruck when I realized that almost all of the goals I’d written were happening in my life in one form or another at this very point in time. I never would have believed it eight years ago! (As in: how am I going to get THERE from HERE?).
Some students are opening up to me about their families and their friends. Some of them seem to sincerely want attention from an adult. Others treat me one step above disdain. And boy, do they like to talk about their other teachers. Makes me wonder what they’ve said about me!
I probably spend 5-10 hours per lesson outside of class time preparing for what we’re going to do. Then there’s the time spent grading papers, entering the grades on the computer, yadda, yadda. I already knew about the extra time, but what impacts me is that I’m still working my other (half-time) job as a CTE Secretary. I’m also still the Public Information Specialist for the district (although I’m on a leave of absence), so I’m spending time via email to coordinate some duties for that job.
BOTTOM LINE: I’m wearing THREE HATS (Business Education teacher, CTE Secretary, and Public Information Specialist). I’m beginning to feel a bit schizoid. Different people know me from the three different roles and don’t know that I’m doing the other two jobs!
I’m beginning to enjoy teaching, though, and (at least have the illusion that) I’m getting a slight handle on it. Believe me, I know I have tons more to learn! I think the job would be that much better if I were able to start a class and curriculum from scratch rather than trying to fill someone else’s shoes. It’s a little tiring to hear, “Well, Ms. So-And-So did this . . .” Most of the time, I just go with the flow and try not to worry about making everything my own; after all, I’m only going to be there until June 15.
I came home feeling sick yesterday (sore throat, another hazard of teaching) and reflected on my teaching experience so far. I believe that being given the opportunity to teach is an honor and a privilege. I hope I always feel that way.
My supervisor gave me some excellent words of advice just before I started teaching, She said, “They won’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” I’m learning how true those words are.
I’d like to share with you one of the videos we watched in class. Even though it’s about entrepreneurship, I think the message is really about believing in yourself and pursuing your goals. Take a look.
Entrepreneurs Can Change the World from Young Entrepreneurs of Sweden on Vimeo.